Carpe Diem--Seize the Day!
I grew up in a non-Christian home, but was allowed to explore whatever religion I chose, as long as it did not interfere with family time. I am thankful that God laid the groundwork early for me by providing loving Christian neighbors, and faithful, patient Christian friends who waited, watched, and prayed over me. They never pushed, they just gently invited and nudged me ever closer toward the foot of the cross, where one day I recognized my own need for a Savior. I am grateful for their incredible faithfulness.

Ever since then, I have prayed for my family to come to know Jesus’ loving kindness and sacrifice for them on the cross. Gratefully, my two children have already trusted their hearts to Him. My mother and brother passed away years ago, so just my dad and sister remain. My prayers for them have continued for the past 30 years. It has often been a discouraging time of watching and waiting, for any outward signs or interest, but then I am reminded of those who watched and waited for me, and how God longs to have them know Him intimately. How often were they discouraged by my lack of desire? Yet they continued their vigil.

Every fall, in this neck of the woods, is a challenge for anyone who suffers from S.A.D. (Seasonal Affective Disorder). It is an expected and yet totally unwanted blanket of depression that hampers one’s ability to emerge from the fog of cloudy thinking and sense of foreboding. I had been there often, and I know what it feels like.

S.A.D. hit my dad hard and fast this year. I think it was aided and abetted by the diagnosis that his cancer had returned once again. He has been making end of life decisions for a while now…what to keep, what to get rid of, who to give it to, but not the most important one of all...where will he spend his eternity? This latest one-two punch sent him spiraling into depression, and yet it is also the first time in his life where I have seen him reach out. He is finally coming to the end of himself, and I think it scares him.

God can and often does use hard things in our lives to give us fresh perspective. A bit more than two months ago, I started emailing my dad every morning after praying for him. I send him a greeting, a bit of news, a picture, and a thought, with no expectations other than to show him that I love him. He often does not have the physical or emotional energy to respond. But, it is here in this most vulnerable time and season of his life, between the lines of the email pages that he is beginning to share his vulnerability with his youngest child, me. Strangely, it is depression and the inevitability of death that has opened a door between us to slowly begin to share what his heart really longs for…the assurance of a life with permanent and unwavering Good News.

What is God teaching me today? He is teaching me to be still in His presence, let His plan for my dad unfold as He sees fit, and to continue to persist in prayer.
Psalm 46:10—“Cease striving and know that I am God.”